DWI

DWI usually means “driving while intoxicated.” The more common offense, however, is “driving while incompetent.” I’ve just returned from a quick round of errands, during which I observed a young female driver who:

• Pulled up to a drive-by mailbox and then had to fumble for her mail. (Old female drivers are usually the ones who have to fumble for their mail when they pull up to a drive-by mailbox.)

• Threw her mail in a slot and only then looked to see that she had used an “Express Mail” box.

• Pulled forward and paused for a moment as if she were thinking about backing up (and into my car) in order to reach into the mailbox for her miscast mail.

• Made an “Austin stop” (that is, slowed down) before pulling onto the street.

• Proceeded to make an illegal U-turn and looped out into the traffic lane in order to do so, instead of staying in the turning lane. (“Well, officer, how was I supposed to make an illegal U-turn without making a illegal turning maneuver?”)

• Capped her performance by sporting an opaque “Kerry-Edwards” bumper sticker in her rear window (illegally, I’m sure).

Not counting her gender and relative youth against her (no sexist or agist am I), the young woman is at least a six-time loser. But I saw her in action for only a few minutes. Think what the rest of her life must be like.

Perhaps she is kind to her mother. But I have no reason to believe that, given her evident disregard for other persons.

Related posts:

Pet Peeves (04/06/04)
You’re Driving Me Crazy (Revised Version) (06/21/04)